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Why do some people think carrying your baby around all the time is bad?

Last post 03-10-2006, 8:02 PM by quinnsmom. 4 replies.
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  •  03-05-2006, 9:46 AM 13145

    Why do some people think carrying your baby around all the time is bad?

    When I tell some people I do this (carry my son around) or that ds will not go to bed unless he is rocked to sleep by mom they are horrified! Like they can't believe I spoil him like that. They say, how do you get anything done? I know this drives you all nuts too but seriously, I wonder how can people "train" their little ones to be with the CIO method but I don't say it to them! It would break my heart and go against all instints to listen to a cry and not take care of it. I have read in baby books that at Logan's age they cry 2-3 hours a day! I bet he doesn't cry 2-3 minutes a day! And how is that bad? Sorry I'm just venting because I have so many clients that are of the WWII generation and they love to tell me how to raise my son.


    Ann

    Mommy to Logan 8-25-05
  •  03-05-2006, 11:08 AM 13146 in reply to 13145

    Re: Why do some people think carrying your baby around all the time is bad?

    I have had many people tell me the same thing. At first I really thought they were telling me to change what I was doing. Now I like to think they are just telling me they did it differently. My MIL is a big one to let me know she did it differently with my dh. I just say oh my Dr. said this, or the AAP says this now. Most of the time I don't say anything.
    Beth
  •  03-05-2006, 9:45 PM 13159 in reply to 13145

    Re: Why do some people think carrying your baby around all the time is bad?

    Oh I hear ya!  Just doing what my heart tells me is rigt for my babies ... God given ... God created instincts.  Today we spent all morning and most of the afternoon with my in-laws at an 80th b-day party.  Room full of 50-some people, Most could not believe that the only time I was willing to put Zeke down was to chang his diaper.  But then they were also going ga-ga over how happy and calm he always seems.  These are the same people who can't say enough about my kind and thoughful and polite children,   but then think that I should parent totally differernt.  I just want to shout "wel....duh!!!....ever think that the reason they are such great kids is because we parent respectfully, discipline gentally and allow them to be kids, kids who are not rushed into independane or weaning.

    Ok ... thanks for letting me rant & ventStick out tongue [:P]

    So  glad to have oter parents who "get this"

    Blessing to all of ya!


    Blessings~ Heather

    mama to Mikayla (9-7-95), Gus (9-17-98),
    Owen (2-27-02) & Ezekiel (9-14-05)

    married to Allen (7-17-03)
  •  03-07-2006, 7:38 AM 13211 in reply to 13145

    Re: Why do some people think carrying your baby around all the time is bad?

    I just think there are so many people out there who want children, but then don't want to spend so much time CARING for their children, because it's "too much."

    I also think there are people out there who are from a totally different generation and mindset who just don't understand or like change.  They think they're being helpful and friendly because we're younger and "don't know" so they're kindly offering their advice.

    BLAH.

    Either way, I try not to argue with people. I usually just say "different strokes for different folks" or "there are as many ways to parent as there ARE parents" or when people "warn" me that I'm creating a bad habit by letting ds co-sleep, I just say, "well, we'll deal with it IF it becomes a problem for us."

    I never realized how much unsolicited advice I was going to get. I thought I'd had plenty when we announced the baby's name (everyone hated it!) but that was nothing compared to the "advice" I get now.  It's even harder for me because dh's "aunt" just got a job in my office, so I constantly hear about how she raised her son differently, but "he turned out okay, so I must have done something right." UGH.

  •  03-10-2006, 8:02 PM 13389 in reply to 13146

    Re: Why do some people think carrying your baby around all the time is bad?

    Beth I like your attitude!  The first time someone (a person who I though was going to be my friend...) looked a tme in a weird way and said "Oh you carry you baby *all* the time? Not me, I need time for myself."  I was about to go off on her.  It still makes me mad to think about that...

    But I think I will take what you said and think of it that way.  She was just telling me how she "does it".  I'll  ignore the condescending attitude and try not be so defensive.  I'm happy the way I do things and it keeps my baby close to me - what could be better? :)


    Michelle
    Mom to Quinn
    with baby #2 due in Sept!
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